Creature Comforts N°7
A sporadic Sunday newsletter to replenish and reset yourself for the week ahead—from your Guardian Angel of the Lagoon.
Last week, I finally gave myself permission to show up to this newsletter imperfectly and something miraculous happened. The pressure was gone. I no longer had that sinking feeling—you know the one—like you have a book report due at midnight and you haven’t even started. There was no pressure. Something shifted. I felt free. I felt like writing again.
Another miraculous thing happened: in the time of my writing hiatus, I gained a few new followers! Welcome and good tidings! I’m going to be candid with you, my dear reader, because life is short and I’m conducting a social experiment on myself: facing my fears. I feel that these fears might be holding me back in life. Something tells me that facing my fears can push me forward in life, expand my impact, or increase my sense of self-worth. These fears usually manifest as little things I avoid in an effort to stay comfortable.
I’ve struggled with the fear of being seen. . .
For an introvert, that fear might be posting on social media account. For an artist, perhaps showing your art in an exhibition. For me, it’s the discomfort of being perceived. Obviously I have to unpack this because it seems like a ridiculous thing to fear yet here we are! I’ve struggled with the fear of being seen, so naturally the idea of writing for a growing audience has induced a tiny shred of discomfort. What the hell is a “fear of being seen” anyways?!
I need to investigate that more. But life has a funny way of presenting us with opportunities for facing our fears AKA growth. Of course the universe would send me more readers to help break down my fear of being seen. We’re tossing you in the deep end, kid! Good luck! Luckily, I learned how to swim when I was a baby. I digress.
In hindsight, this has been a year of immense growth and opportunity.
As we begin the last month of 2023, naturally we take inventory of our lives and reflect of the year that’s behind us. Who were you in December of 2022? What felt like your greatest blessing back then? What was your struggle? What were your hopes for the year? Only in hindsight I realize that this has been a year of immense growth and opportunity. I have a lot to be grateful for and as we roll into the final four weeks of the year—so what better time to reflect?!
It’s tempting to focus on all the things we don’t have, but what’s the benefit of that? No matter who you are or where you go, there will always be someone who has a higher salary, a bigger house, a romantic partner, more familial support, better hair, less medication, more motivation, etc. The list is endless, but I’ll put a lid on it. If energy flows where attention goes, why would you want to send energy to your place of lack?
Instead, consider focusing your attention on the things you love, the things that make you uniquely you, the things you already have. We have plenty of blessings sparkling all around us and their potent magic multiplies when we name them. Gratitude is the attitude; it literally makes you happier.
“The word gratitude is derived from the Latin word gratia, which means grace, graciousness, or gratefulness…[it’s] is a thankful appreciation for what an individual receives, whether tangible or intangible.
With gratitude, people acknowledge the goodness in their lives. In the process, people usually recognize that the source of that goodness lies at least partially outside themselves.
As a result, being grateful also helps people connect to something larger than themselves as individuals—whether to other people, nature, or a higher power.” (Harvard Medical School, 2021)
Being that it’s the end of the year and all, what better time to take stock of the things we have to be grateful for? Make a list and check it twice. It’s time to name the things that deserve a hat tip in gratitude. I’ll go first. Let us begin!
The Hat Tip Tally: 2023
I’m grateful for my sister, my partner, family and my friends. I believe in quality over quantity, and my squad is absolutely world-class.
Dark chocolate
For being employed, which allows me to (barely) afford all my bills, and all the opportunities this particular job has presented:
Traveling to New York, NY
Attending the Brooklyn Book Festival
Meeting badass authors
Discovering bookshops like Yu & Me, Bluestockings, and Greenlight
Speaking on a panel at Indie Author Day in Anaheim
Traveling to attend the Pacific Northwest Booksellers Association’s autumnal tradeshow in Portland, OR
Finally getting to visit Powell’s City of Books
Traveling alone, one of my greatest exhilarations in life
Working remotely
Coffee, specifically cold brew with nut milk creamer. GAH!
Endlessly grateful for digital publishing platforms like Substack. These cool things make it easier than ever to fulfill the dream of being a writer without any gatekeeping or permission-seeking.
For not drinking these past few months: It’s boosted my self-confidence and along with that, my self-worth. Also helped me to realize I don’t need a glass of wine to be a moody writer smoldering with passion, professing absurdities through the written word. Major hat tip.
Going along with that, I’m grateful for getting to the place in AF life where it doesn’t feel like I’m “living without” the thing. It just feels like living.
Lastly, I’m deeply grateful to you for reading, and for subscribing to this newsletter. The magic doesn’t happen in the writing itself but in the exchange between writer and reader. So THANK YOU!!!!
On this week’s menu:
Take this gratitude quiz for some insight and free mood-boosting resources.
Trick yourself into feeling thankful. Pick one pleasure to give up for the week: sweets, coffee, watching TV, music, podcasts, or any one thing of your choice.
Indulge in that thing today, but commit to giving it up until next Sunday. See if your gratitude shifts a bit.
Write a thank you letter. Think of someone who has positively impacted your life, who you appreciate, and write them a letter. This could be a private letter for your eyes only or an email/letter you actually send. That’s totally up to you. Here are some starter prompts to get the juices flowing:
How/when did you both meet? What’s your earliest memory of them?
How was your life at the time?
What has that person done for you?
How did that make you feel then and now?
If by chance you’re grateful for this newsletter, or for writing, or indie publishing—please consider sharing this newsletter with a friend! Forward them the email, or use this as an excuse to text them out of the blue. Sharing my work the most impactful zero-cost way to show your support <3
XX—CZ